|Guide to: Revenge and School Records|
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"Guide to: Revenge and School Records" is a season 3 episode of Ned's Declassified School Survival Guide.
Part 1: Revenge
The episode begins with Cookie getting chased by Evelyn, a mystery girl getting hit by a lot of volleyballs, and Ned hanging upside down. He then explains that this episode is “a little story about revenge.”
Seven hours ago, Loomer drags Ned's seat away making him fall down at 3 periods (homeroom, English, and social studies), then Ned plans to get revenge on him. In science, Ned unscrews the seat, and the desk and Loomer sits down, making the chair and the desk break. Loomer is sent to the office for destruction of school property. Coach Dirga pulls Moze from all her classes for whole day of volleyball practice, since they're playing Buchanan Middle School, and Buchanan wants revenge on Polk for beating them last year. Evelyn pops up and tells Cookie they're having a pop quiz in math on logarithms, and he should study up. Cookie is confused by Evelyn's constantly changing behavior.
Dirga introduces a new member of the volleyball team, Sheila. She doesn't think Polk will be able to beat Buchanan, and this motivates Dirga to drive the team hard in practice. Moze thinks she looks familiar but Sheila says they don't know each other. Sheila doesn't appear to be a very good volleyball player, and keeps hitting Moze with the volleyball. Martin Qwerly goes up to Ned with packing tape on his mouth. Ned takes it off and Martin says Missy put it on him and he wants revenge. He wants help from Ned because of how he got Loomer back, and calls Ned "The Revenger", complete with theme music. Ned agrees and gets Missy back by luring her into Gordy's closet. He puts packing tape over the door opening, getting Missy tangled in it.
In math class, Professor Xavier says the pop quiz is on algorithms, not logarithms. Evelyn laughs gloatingly as she starts her test. Cookie is further confused by what Evelyn is doing to him. Cookie fails the quiz and his GPA drops by two tenths of a point. Sheila is even hitting Moze with the volleyball in the hallways. Cookie plans to get Evelyn back by pelting her with water balloons, but Loomer walks in front of her and gets hit. Cookie runs for it. Moze warns Ned not to let this "Revenger" thing get to his head. Ned promises he won't, but gets bombarded by requests for revenge from Lisa, Backpack Boy, and Coconut Head. Ned initially says no, but they say they remixed the theme music and came up with a costume for Ned. Ned agrees. He gets back a kid for tripping Lisa, Spencer for stealing Claire Sawyer, Future Lawyer from Backpack Boy, and Mike for putting Coconut Head's underwear in the shower during gym.
Cookie puts the water balloons in Evelyn's locker, but when she opens her locker to get a book, the balloons don't fall out. But they do when Cookie tries it himself. The volleyball team heads into the gym for practice, only to discover that the floor is slippery because Sheila had just polished it. Most of the team is injured, and Moze starts to think Sheila is sabotaging them. Stu comes up to Ned and asks for revenge on Lance Widget for "turning [his] entire world upside-down". Cookie rigs a net of water balloons over the doorway of Evelyn's next class. Evelyn is about to go inside when she apologizes to Cookie for lying to him about the pop quiz, and says she's a jerk. She likes that Cookie didn't try to get back at her and kisses him. Evelyn goes into the classroom amidst Cookie's warnings and gets drenched by the water balloons. She chases Cookie down the hall.
Buchanan is almost here for the volleyball game. The only team members who can play are Moze, Sheila, and two benchwarmers. Sheila is happy that most of the team is injured. She then reveals herself to be Buchanan's best spiker from last year, and says that Buchanan will win when she plays badly for Polk. Moze points out she abandoned her team, and since she's their best player, Buchanan doesn't stand a chance. Buchanan shows up and starts pelting her with volleyballs. Ned takes Stu to see what he has planned for Lance, a rope trap that will hoist Lance up in the air by his ankle. Stu says it's because Lance ate his cookie, and Ned realizes he's gone over the edge with revenge. He saves Lance from the rope trap, and is caught by Loomer, Missy, Spencer, Mike, and the kid who tripped Lisa, who recognize him as "The Revenger". Ned backs up into the rope trap and is hoisted up in the air. Soon, we are right back where we started as Cookie runs past, being chased by Evelyn, and Sheila is close behind, still being pelted by volleyballs.
- Tip#150.RNG - Revenge is a nasty game where everyone loses.
Part 2: School Records
After Ned crashes the mop bucket slingshot into Vice Principal Crubbs, he gets sent to the office. Cookie wears his headphones and drops his pencil when Sweeney calls his name in attendance, accidentally getting himself marked absent in homeroom. In Crubbs' office, Ned discovers how big his permanent record is, and that it will follow him to high school. Ned's misuse of cans for the canned food drive, making tables collapse, and fun with the mop bucket slingshot will impede him in high school. Moze is proud of all her plaques for the athletic records she's broken, but is determined to break the record for most school records in female sports.
Sweeney approaches Cookie in the hallway, saying he was not marked present in homeroom, ending his perfect attendance record. Cookie swears he was in homeroom, but Sweeney says he holds a record for never being wrong. Moze breaks the shot put record and Ned starts sucking up to Crubbs. Crubbs tells Ned that doing good deeds might lighten his permanent record. Coconut Head, Martin Qwerly, and Lisa Zemo all back Cookie up and tell Sweeney he was in homeroom. Moze is thrilled with her six broken records. Ned says that the all-time record for most school records is seven. Moze is determined to beat that, but there are no more records to break in female sports, so she decides to join the boys' wrestling team.
Ned tries to shrink his record by fixing tables, helping teachers across the hall, and collecting cans for the food drive. Moze makes the boys' wrestling team and Cookie gets help from Martin, Lisa, and Coconut Head to build a time machine and prove Sweeney wrong. The next day, they test the machine on Sweeney, which is really just recreating the scene in homeroom. Cookie tries to prove Sweeney he was present, but Sweeney sees through the charade. After being prodded by the rest of the class, Sweeney agrees to change the attendance record.
Moze takes part in her first wrestling match, but her opponent is huge. Too scared to face him, she runs out of the gym. Ned tells Crubbs all the good deeds he did, but Crubbs reiterates that the good deeds might shrink his record, which turns out it actually cannot. Ned realizing that he has tricked him, Crubbs adds that it is a karma which "makes the world go around", and thus Ned's record will still be going to high school. He puts his record on the last table Ned forgot to repair, and his record slides into the paper shredder.
The episode ends as Moze finds out that she did win a plaque: the first girl to wrestle for Polk, Sweeney is now happily appreciated by Cookie and the rest of his students, and Ned, who learns that sometimes doing good deeds can cause good things to happen, shows Crubbs grieving on his shredded permanent record.
- Tip#364.PRFU - Don't forget, your permanent record follows you.
- Tip#364.DGT - When you do good things, good things can happen.
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